In my life, I had to become my own mentor because I didn’t have one. Most of my teachers fought with me; with my vision. People who were stronger than me were threatened by me; they didn’t like someone who asked hard questions. I sought out teachers, but they always failed me. I would often transcend or outgrew their limitations. I found no mastery in them—and I had a longing for masters.
In film school, my presumed mentors did not want to take me on. The problem is, I was too self-sufficient, too bold, too outspoken, too much of an individual, too brave and too resilient. And because of this, no one thought I needed to be taught. No one thought I needed direction. So when I left film school, I was on my own; while the film department board liked to help cripples get jobs and internships. I wasn’t crippled but I needed those jobs and internships just like anyone else. So basically, the school was throwing their best students away.
So I figured out much later in life that it is a MISTAKE, a huge mistake for any mentor to ignore the enormous potentiality of any child or student that displays enormity or potential. Don’t back down from it, help those kids—because they are the ones that need the most direction—for they have the capacity to become great leaders. And by “leaders” I do not mean authority figures—I mean, they have the chutzpah to lead—to direct and offer others direction.
So right now, after doing everything on my own with everything I can muster—it is a time in my life where I am seeking a mentor. I need one now for my professional career. I need someone so strong and secure in who they are to show me the way, because I have found that no one becomes a master without masters.
Believe it or not, every master has a mentor. My Tai Chi teacher is a master yet he was two masters; both of whom would only teach selective people in secret.
When I found out who my yoga teacher’s mentor was—I went to her mentor. I started to learn from the master’s master. Every psychotherapist has a therapist. That is because learning stops with yourself. You always need someone greater than you who is outside of you to show you more; usually more of what you can’t see.
Despite how much how learned I appear to be most of what I gained, I’ve developed on my own. I have always wanted a mentor but never had one. I have been wanting one since childhood.
I envy the Jewish people. I have no interest in being Jewish but they are a strong breed because they have Rabbis. They have life mentors from the time they are born. They are very lucky. Rabbis are not like priests. They never preach to you. They take a look at your disposition (your character makeup), access your potential and grow that seed. It’s a beautiful thing.
When you have a life mentor, you have health. You have strength, confidence, and direction. You have something to fall back on, a foundation.
I don’t now if it’s a western society thing, but everything seems to be done backwards. People love helping the weak, the needy, and the helpless but no one wants to help the kids and the people who are strong—become stronger.
You see this in the work place: a manager hires a weak person so that his authority and knowledge would never be questioned. What he and people of this type create in society is a world of betrayal; where smart people see dumb people get ahead. That is a sin in my opinion. It is a world-class societal sin. It’s called Egalitarianism and it is the most fucked up concept our educational system has adopted.
Usually, in Eastern or more spiritual societies: when you see potential in something—you try to save it, you try to cultivate it, you try to bring out that strength which leads to mastership. And in teachings where mastership is concerned, the teacher never teaches the weakest link but rather spots out the strongest ones and initiates them. This is because everyone has to learn how to prove their worth; that is how they step up and become strong. There are no handouts.
Based on what I learned and observed is that the fruit of learning is in giving. That is why mentoring others and helping them get ahead is crucial. I know that when I get to a place in life that requires me to teach, it would be my greatest reward and obligation to give to others what I didn’t have in my own life.
I think it’s important to help the strong—because that is what leadership is based upon. And we need good leaders, don’t we?